There’s always less money after divorce. Adjusting to the new reality is not just about cutting back on your spending. It’s about embracing that having the best stuff is not what’ s important in life:
Financially, it was very tight but that was OK. What’s more important is authenticity and putting that value on living your best life, not having the best stuff. ~ Suzy
Divorce for Suzy meant a dramatic change in lifestyle. She was married for thirteen years and had given up her job as a makeup artist when she and her husband had relocated overseas for her husband’s career. Getting divorced meant accepting that there would be a significant change in lifestyle and Suzy came to
The Divorce Coach Says
Above a certain income level, financial experts say it’s possible to cut your expenditure by some 30 percent without it negatively impacting your lifestyle.
Of course, it isn’t as simple as just cutting your spending especially when you consider long term and short term time frames. Regardless of how feasible such reductions are, the prospect or thought of managing with less can be paralyzing.
Here’s an exercise that might help you.
For the next week, don’t change any of your spending habits but do keep a record of everything you spend. At the end of the week categorize each expenditure as “essential” or “nice-to-have.” Then total your spending and each category. What percentage of spending does your nice-to-have spending represent?
What purchases could you eliminate? What if you kept this up for a month? Three months? If your inner voice is screaming, or even whispering, “no” explore that a little. Where is the resistance coming from? Is it that your friends hangout at expensive restaurants and buy expensive gifts and you won’t be able to socialize with them? Are you worried that other people will notice that you’re buying your clothes from different stores? Does it mean you’ll have to make some lifestyle changes? Then just keep asking yourself why. This will help uncover your fears about living with less money.
This is a bit like counting calories when you want to lose weight. The minute you start counting calories, you are more conscious of what you’re eating so even if the program says to make no changes to start with, you will anyway. It’s unavoidable. When you start consciously thinking about spending, you’ll find yourself skipping purchases you wouldn’t have thought twice about before.