Two Kids and A Fish's eldest daughter was twenty-one when her marriage ended and it was only after it had ended that Two Kids And a Fish learned that her ex's treatment of their daughter was much worse than she previously knew. Although her eldest has very little contact with her father today, she's at risk of repeating the cycle of violence. I asked Two Kids And A Fish to talk … [Read more...]
Two Very Different Father Daughter Relationships
It's not unusual for siblings to have very different parental relationships. I would even guess it's probably more the norm and with Two Kids And A Fish's story, I'm wondering if divorce reinforces those differences or changes them? Two Kids and A Fish had two daughters aged twenty-one and nine at the time her marriage ended. Both kids have the same parents but they have very … [Read more...]
Hiding From Your Ex
Shortly after Two Kids and A Fish left the marital home it became clear that she needed to keep her new address secret. It would be like she was hiding from her ex except that she still had to parent with him. Here's Two Kids and a Fish: I have an order of protected address so he can’t come to the house. He doesn’t know where we live. A lot of it had to do with his … [Read more...]
Five Signs of Parental Alienation
By Nancy Kay When Esther shared her experience with parental alienation and how her ex used religion against her, I commented that I could see how she would be puzzled by her children's behavior, wondering if it was real, wondering what exactly she had done to warrant the rejection, wondering what her ex and others had said to have such an impact. Sometimes parental … [Read more...]
What Does It Mean To Be A Mother?
We each carry with us a definition of what it means to be "a good mother", a definition that grows as we grow, a definition that encompasses parts of our mothers, of our friends' mothers, and of movie mothers. And when we have our children that definition continues to evolve. For most of us, getting divorced has meant learning that we can still be good mothers without being … [Read more...]