Married couples do things together. They do fun activities together, they do home projects together, they do household chores together, they make decisions together, they go on vacations together. And that’s part of the beauty of being married – you have a companion. Well, when divorce happens, that companionship goes and for some people that means not doing some activities anymore. However, Heather-Marie was not going to let that happen to her.
My husband was in the military so we had traveled around the world a lot and after he left I was determined that I didn’t want to change my lifestyle.
At the same time, it wasn’t that I was scared so much as my husband had always been there. Some scary things had happened to us in the past. For example, at one apartment, we had peeping Toms. And I would get followed to work by this creepy neighbor. So I was alert to stuff like that.
When my husband left, I thought I had to come up with a way of feeling secure. I was so committed to this idea that I was not going to change the way I live. I was not going to stop traveling. I was not going to stop being in the wilderness and I still wanted to go camping even if I was alone. I just needed to make it feel safe.
So I got a dog – a yellow lab and right after I got her, I told my mom I was coming to visit. I needed to go home even though I couldn’t afford a plane ticket. I packed up the car and the dog and drove all the way from Colorado to New York and I just camped the whole way there. I had my dog so I was safe.
She turned out to be a big sissy but she does have a ferocious bark! Maybe I didn’t really need her but she was the protection I thought I needed.
What I like about Heather-Marie’s tale is that she figured out what she needed to do to make herself comfortable doing the activities that were important to her. When we were married, my husband did all the driving and while I don’t mind driving during the day, I’m not that comfortable with night-driving, especially if it’s unfamiliar territory. That sometimes puts me off going places I would otherwise be interested in. I’m thinking I should splash out on a GPS – I think it would give me the security I need, so I won’t worry about getting lost and not being able to read the street signs quick enough.
Is there an activity you used to like doing but have stopped? Why? Is there something you did so you were able to keep doing an activity you’ve enjoyed?