Yesterday, I introduced you to Marjorie who agreed to delay filing for divorce at her husband’s request. At first she thought it was so they could work out their separation with little disruption to the children. Now, with hindsight, she believes he was putting in motion everything he needed to destroy her. She played right into his hands by getting herself arrested for domestic violence. Here’s Marjorie:
On November 17, 2010, I had intended to go about my usual Wednesday, take the kids to school, drop them off, and then I had a bible study that I had been attending for several years.
Instead, my husband woke me up out of my sleep, telling me that he’s having chest pains and just going on. The argument started when I’m telling him “you need to go to a doctor. ” The name-calling started. He was holding up our wedding album. My husband was a very religious man, and he loved to use the Bible as a way to mind-control me,. He would start quoting scripture, and then out of the other side of his mouth he would be calling me a slut and a whore and all these other types of names.
So he knew what he was doing that morning, and he got me. I grabbed the wedding album and I threw it at him. He ducked, the wedding album hit the wall, pictures went flying all over the place, so the wedding album didn’t hit him. Then he says, “I’m calling the police.”
I didn’t really think anything of it. So I’m in the room picking up all the pictures off the floor and I’m crying. I hear him calling the police and giving them the address. He hangs up the phone and locks himself in the bathroom until the police got there.
The police come, we give our two sides of the story. I thought they were just going to take our statements and leave. After I’m done, I’m helping the girls get dressed, because the whole time they were in the other side of the house. They hadn’t seen anything. So we get dressed and we get ready to go out to the car.
Then, the police officer comes up to me and says, “Ma’am, I’m sorry, but I’m going to have to take you in.” I asked why and he said, “Well, your husband is adamant about pressing charges. With any sort of domestic violence, if the one person feels fearful of the other party, then someone has to be taken away, and since you were the one that admitted to throwing the wedding album, which means it’s a threat of bodily harm, then you have to be the one that has to go down.”
I had my girls in the car and my oldest jumped out of the car and she’s like, “You are kidding me. You are kidding me!” She looks at him and she’s like, “What are you doing?”
He just had this stone cold look on his face, he didn’t want to hear anything, and they handcuffed me in front of my girls and put me in the back of the police car.
I’m telling my oldest daughter, “Calm down. I need you to go into the house, I need you to secure certain things, and just wait for me to call,” because the police officer said, “I’ll get you down there, you’ll be booked, and then I’ll have you out in a few hours.”
The police officer, he knows what’s going on, he said, “It’s a shame, I know y’all are going through a divorce and this didn’t have to happen. I asked your husband if he really wanted to do this, but my hands are tied. I’ve got to do this.” I said, “That’s fine, it’s fine.”
We get down there, they book me and I’m thinking, “I’m going to be processed and out.” Then they tell me, “Oh, I’m sorry. First appearance have already gone out, you’re going have to stay overnight.”
It’s just amazing how you can wake up one morning and your whole life as you knew it is gone and it’s not because of some natural turn of events, but it’s because of someone else’s choosing. That’s the hard pill to swallow.
The Divorce Coach Says
I’m pretty sure this isn’t the type of incident the domestic violence laws are designed to protect against. What this segment demonstrates is how a person can take their knowledge of the law (and yes, Marjorie’s husband had consulted with an attorney two days prior to this event) and use it to their advantage and you know, this story is far from over. It. is. frightening.
As I said yesterday, once you start talking about divorce, you need to be on the alert for red flags, prepare for the worst and hope for the best.
Photo credit: 911 Bail Bonds Las Vegas