Comments on: A lousy husband but a great dad http://sincemydivorce.com/a-lousy-husband-but-a-great-dad/ Celebrating the good from divorce Fri, 10 Sep 2010 13:10:59 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: SinceMyDivorce http://sincemydivorce.com/a-lousy-husband-but-a-great-dad/comment-page-1/#comment-8301 SinceMyDivorce Wed, 16 Jun 2010 01:40:27 +0000 http://sincemydivorce.com/?p=2397#comment-8301 While it's definitely helpful to hear the input of others, the decision to stay or leave a marriage is yours. Only you know what your marriage is really like. I hope you're happier now. While it's definitely helpful to hear the input of others, the decision to stay or leave a marriage is yours. Only you know what your marriage is really like. I hope you're happier now.

]]> By: Lisa http://sincemydivorce.com/a-lousy-husband-but-a-great-dad/comment-page-1/#comment-8208 Lisa Mon, 14 Jun 2010 02:31:43 +0000 http://sincemydivorce.com/?p=2397#comment-8208 I had to leave the abuse even though others told me to stay for the kids. They are old enough and I can't take it anymore. I had to leave the abuse even though others told me to stay for the kids. They are old enough and I can't take it anymore.

]]> By: SinceMyDivorce http://sincemydivorce.com/a-lousy-husband-but-a-great-dad/comment-page-1/#comment-4622 SinceMyDivorce Thu, 04 Feb 2010 04:34:21 +0000 http://sincemydivorce.com/?p=2397#comment-4622 Hi Student Mama - good to hear from you again. It is amazing how much we learn about ourselves when we reflect back and I completely agree with your last sentence. Hi Student Mama – good to hear from you again. It is amazing how much we learn about ourselves when we reflect back and I completely agree with your last sentence.

]]> By: StudentMama http://sincemydivorce.com/a-lousy-husband-but-a-great-dad/comment-page-1/#comment-4617 StudentMama Thu, 04 Feb 2010 00:47:19 +0000 http://sincemydivorce.com/?p=2397#comment-4617 I married my husband for stability. My father died early, and he was abusive. So, I was really glad that my ex wasn't like that! Unfortunately, he was abusive in other ways (workaholic, and infidelity were two). I see now, that I was looking for safety. I didn't have a father and the ex sort of took over that role for me. We tried to work through that in counseling also but it was tough to break the cycle. I was similar to Carolyn - my mom was a single mom who didn't date much and had poor boundaries. I'm just beginning to learn about boundaries (something I didn't assert because I was too afraid) - now I realize just how important they are as I began dating and ran into some of the same problems I had with my ex. It's interesting how much work we must do on ourselves before we can truely be ready for anyone else. I married my husband for stability. My father died early, and he was abusive. So, I was really glad that my ex wasn't like that! Unfortunately, he was abusive in other ways (workaholic, and infidelity were two). I see now, that I was looking for safety. I didn't have a father and the ex sort of took over that role for me. We tried to work through that in counseling also but it was tough to break the cycle.

I was similar to Carolyn – my mom was a single mom who didn't date much and had poor boundaries. I'm just beginning to learn about boundaries (something I didn't assert because I was too afraid) – now I realize just how important they are as I began dating and ran into some of the same problems I had with my ex. It's interesting how much work we must do on ourselves before we can truely be ready for anyone else.

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